Hoping that this will be the last.
Recently, a friend of mine, told her story regarding a guy who she had mutual understanding with and she shared how she became happier after posting her last thoughts about the same and that made her satisfied as an addition to the “acceptance” stage and told me that she moved on with a smile.
“Masaya akong nagsimulang mag post tungkol sa kanya at masaya din ako hanggang sa huling post ko tungkol sa kanya” said-ish by my friend.
That came into my thoughts that, I also started sharing stuff about this “guy” however, it never came to the point of sharing my last thoughts. It concludes that maybe, just maybe, I am not yet over him or maybe I am, but I am not happy about it.
Being true to myself, I am still mad and guilty to what happened between me and this “guy”. I loved him for who he was, waited for him for months, and assumed a place in his heart. I can still feel the hatred gushing in my veins every time I see him happy with someone new, who I once wished that, that should be me. I am not going to be biased with myself but I know and I admit, I have my own mistakes and guilt towards to what I have done to made him walked out of my life.
Thankfully that hatred never pursue in accordance with my belief that be nicer to everyone and let the karma do the bitch actions. I know that this is bad to think but I still wish karma is still around with him and waiting for the right timing to attack the best bitch shot it can ever made. Hence, I apologize but I am still a human and think & do bitchy stuff.
For sure, he is happier that I am not anymore around him and satisfied to what he has right now, as well as to my own life although I will not deny the fact that sometimes, I still think of him and hoping those days will comeback although I doubt. Nevertheless, I am ready to express my formal farewell to him but I think today is not yet the right time.
All in all, I thank this “guy” for the past although you act 80% douche after the last call that we had, I apologize for everything, and hope to see you around. *smiles*
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